Monday, August 22, 2011

Modern Translation: The Awesome Wife's Guide (Rule #17)

(This is the 17th post of this series. Click here to read the entire series.) 
 
* Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember,  he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. 

Humm... let's discuss what we don't like about this rule. "Master of the House" - I'm not sure how I feel about that. My husband does technically own our house (it came with the husband) but I am the one who keeps it running. Granted, he is responsible for fixing anything that breaks and anything that involves a ladder and the roof. Oh, who am I kidding? Our cat rules this house! Have you ever seen those signs that read, "This is the cats house and he just lets us live here"? That's pretty much true with our beast. 

"You have no right to question him"- <cough, bullshit, cough>  

I do trust my husband. I respect him. I have faith in his judgment and integrity. I am glad that I don't make the decisions around here alone and have defaulted to his judgment quite a lot actually. I believe him to be a fair and trusthworthy man. With that said... he has his moments and you better believe I will call him out when those moments present themselves.  

I really do believe that trust is one of the most important, if not THE most important, element of a relationship. I've seen many a relationships fall apart because trust just wasn't there. I've also watched relationships fall apart because one partner didn't trust the other... even though they had absolutely no reason to NOT truth in him/her. If we are being completely honest here, I've seen the stereotyped jealous/untrusting woman part played out waaaaay to often. 

This rule makes me think of bachelor parties. My husband was the fourth guy in his group of friends to get married. All four of them had bachelor parties and for all four parties the guys adhered to a strict "no photography" policy. As a woman, I should probably be disgusted by this policy but I actually think it is really, REALLY smart.  

I didn't ask my husband any questions before or after his bachelor party. (Though when he came home with two skinned knees I did ask if he had any other injuries that might require medical attention.) I know how my brain works. If I thought about it, or asked questions, or saw any evidence of what happened my mind would start racing directly towards the worst possible scenarios. Instead, I chose to not let myself wander away from trusting a perfectly proven truthworthy man. 

With that said, and once again, if he stayed out all night he would be walking into the Pennsylvania Inquisition the next morning!  

Dear 1950's Housewife, 
There is a big difference between being trusting and being blind. For some people this is a very fine line. You are right- as wives we need to trust our husbands. But we do also need to be smart and trust our own judgment. Learning how to do this well can take a lifetime. Hopefully, we all have partners who are worth it!
Have a pleasant day, 
The 2010s Housewife

1 comment:

  1. I just stumbled across your blog from blogher, I really like your blog and am a new follower as well!

    I couldn't believe this post, I wrote a post on the good wifes guide two weeks ago! Here's the link if you want to check it out! http://www.theatypicalhousewife.com/2011/08/good-wife-guide.html

    Monica @ theatypicalhousewife.com

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